Miss Ashley (imagine_peace) wrote in squeezemylemon,
Miss Ashley

What Is And What Should Never Be; Part Seven.

Get ready to fall over; I finished Part Seven of What Is And What Should Never Be! I just had ideas running through my head this morning, so I got up and finished it. ...It only took like three months. Anyway, hope ya'll like it:

Part Seven

“Juliet, what’s the matter? I’m here,” Jimmy asked when I’d been connected to him.

“It’s Robert…” I began through my tears.

“Oh God, what’s he done? What did he say to you?”

I tried to compose myself, “Jimmy, I want you to be honest with me please,” I took in a deep breath before speaking again, “Has Robert ever… cheated on me?”

The other line was silent and for a second I thought we’d been disconnected. Jimmy sighed, “Bloody hell Jules, is that what this is about?”

I was taken aback; the friend I thought I had wasn’t supporting me as I thought he would. I put up my emotional walls in defense and replied coldly, “Just answer the question.”

“He’s a man, what do you think?” Jimmy stated just as coldly. Shock washed over me again, but what had I expected from a rock star? I was his wife and my own track record wasn’t much better. But I had really thought Robert was different from all the others. I had been stupid and naïve, I was ashamed, “Anyway you’re doing the same thing to him.”

“Why are you treating me this way?!” I cried down the line. Robert hadn’t even treated me as badly as Jimmy was at this moment and it was breaking my heart.

“Juliet I’m sorry, I just don’t have time for this.”

Now I was livid, “Oh you have time for your whores, but certainly none at all for someone that you once claimed to love!” I slammed the phone down in a rage.

I sat by my bed in despair. I couldn’t call Robert back, not yet anyway; the thought of how much I had probably hurt him was too much to bear. However, I did have half a mind in my hormonal state to call Jimmy and yell at him. I had just determined to do so and was about to pick up the receiver, when it rang first. Slightly frightened, I picked up the phone.

“Jules? It’s me. I’m sorry I spouted off at you like I did. I’m in just as deep as you are. Please forgive me, love,” Jimmy stammered.

My heart ached and I smirked to myself, “It’s alright Jimmy, you’re under stress right now.”

“Bloody hell that’s a relief! I thought you might never speak to me again.”

“I had thought of calling and shouting down the phone at you, but I’ve decided against it. As long as you realize you’re an idiot.”

Jimmy laughed, “Guilty as charged. See, this is what love does to a man!”

My insides fluttered and I cleared my throat, “You mean that?”

“With all my heart,” he replied softly. Goodness the things I would do to him if he were there with me! Then my mind went back to Robert; Jimmy seemed to have read my thoughts, “This is the first time he’s done a thing like this you know, that I’m aware of.”

My eyes burned as I fought the tears, “But what if I hadn’t been there for all the other tours? What would he have done then? And what about the future? I don’t know how to feel about this.”

“You have a right as his wife to be upset Juliet, “Jimmy reasoned, “but it gets lonely out here.”

I sighed, trying to ignore the old rock and roll lifestyle saying that had just come out of Jimmy’s mouth, “And you’re right, I am not acting any better. I just wish I felt like I could tell him about us.”

“It’s not the right time yet. You’re in a delicate state to have to deal with that kind of stress. And you need him,” Jimmy explained. It was as if I needed to hear the things I already knew from him; as if he was my conscience.

“I need you too,” I retorted softly. We both were silent a few seconds before I spoke again, an idea on my mind, “Jimmy, come and get me.”

“What?” Jimmy questioned in a quiet voice. I knew he was just as surprised as I was by the words I was now saying.

“Just take me away from here, take me anywhere. I can’t deal with this and I feel you’re the only one I can turn to. Please.”

“Juliet, I don’t know if that is such a good idea. Shouldn’t you be asking this of Robert?”

“He’s part of the problem. I don’t think I can face him, at least not till the baby’s born. I know I’m asking a lot of you. I just need to see a friendly face.” I bit my lip, waiting for answer.

Jimmy let out a long drawn out sigh before answering, “I suppose I could take a couple of days between the next shows to fly home and spend a bit of time with you. If you really need me.

My heart leapt, “I do, I really do. Oh thank you Jimmy!” I could almost hear his smile on the other end.

“I’ll call you back, ok? I love you.”

“I love you too.” The line disconnected.

I waited by my bedside for what seemed like the entire night, losing sleep looking forward to his phone call back. Finally around 2 or so the line rang and I, startled, picked it up right away so as not to wake the rest of the house.

“I’ve got it all fixed up, “Jimmy told me, “I’m going to catch a flight within the hour and I should be seeing you in the afternoon. I’ll try and get some rest on the plane.”

My heart was overflowing with gratitude and love, “Oh thank you Jimmy, I really appreciate this. Does Robert… have any idea?”

“I haven’t spoken to him, I don’t think so. Anyway, I’ve got to go get this plane. I’ll see you soon, love.”

“Ok, thank you!” And we were disconnected once again. I was a mix of emotions; my heart felt like it might burst in love for Jimmy and his willingness, but I also felt incredibly guilty leaving Robert out of the picture. I just hoped by some miracle he could forget me long enough to finish the tour; he was such an emotional person, like myself, that I was afraid he could be overly crushed. As I lay back down to sleep, I tried not to think of it and instead to picture myself in Jimmy’s arms once again.

I must not have realized how tired the night had made me, because when I woke up the first thing I heard was a man’s voice and it wasn’t my father’s. I opened my eyes wearily, expecting to see Jimmy’s gorgeous smiling face in front of mine; but it was not him, it was Robert that I saw in front of me in the late afternoon sun.
“Hi Juliet,” he simply said softly to accommodate my having just woken up. I sat up quickly and pulled the sheets around me, almost as if he was a burglar. Robert sat down next to me and reached out to touch my face, gently caressing my hair.

I closed my eyes and then began to sob uncontrollably as I fell into his arms, “Oh Robert, I’m so sorry!”

Robert held me tight, making shushing sounds in my ear, “Now don’t cry honey, it’s alright.”

I pulled away from him, still sobbing, “But I was horrible to you, and you didn’t deserve it…”

“No I did deserve it,” Robert retorted, forcing me to look at him, “I let my weakness and temptation get to me when all along I should have been thinking of you and the baby. Let the others do what they might, I need to account for myself. I acted like a bastard; you had every reason to hang up on me.”

There was nothing left for to say or do but hug Robert and feel protected in his arms. He managed to climb behind me in the bed, against the wall, and we laid together, his arms around me, and his sweet breath and kisses on my neck. I had wanted this more than I realized.

“How did you know to come to me?” I asked, finally breaking the silence.

“It was all Jimmy’s doing. If it wasn’t for him, I probably would have just drunk myself into a coma feeling sorry for myself. But he told me you needed me, and I realized I needed you just as much.” My heart swelled with immense love for both these men; Jimmy must truly love me to have put my welfare ahead of his own wants. And no matter Robert’s fidelity, his love for me was constant; I could see it in his eyes.

Robert let out a chuckle behind me. “What is it?” I asked.

“I was just remembering all the wonderful times we used to spend together in this bed,” he replied squeezing me to him.

I turned to face him, but not without a bit of difficulty, smiling, “We were so naughty! You know it wasn’t that long ago, but it seems like forever.”

“Ages,” Robert agreed with a nod. He then looked up and eyed the bedside clock, “Blimey now I know why I’m so tired! We ought to get some rest darling.”

“Right,” I agreed. I turned back towards the door and let Robert hold me in a much more comfortable position due to my swelling abdomen. I felt safe and sighed dreamily, forgetting all about Jimmy and everything else in process.

I awoke to a sharp pain in my side, which I expected only to be Robert moving in our confined space. But when I felt a second pain only a few minutes later, I knew something else had to be going on. Forcing my eyes open I groaned; it wasn’t even light out yet! I got up out of bed, prying myself from my husband and headed for the bathroom, but just before I got there, an even larger spasm ran through me and I had to stop and hold onto the wall for support. A sudden rush of wetness dripped down my legs and my mind raced- Oh God, it was blood! Surely I must have be covered in it! Turning the bathroom light on, I only saw what appeared to be water on the floor. Another pain came on as I realized what exactly had happened- my water had broke, I was having contractions! The pain hadn’t bothered me until this moment and I nearly doubled over; I wanted to panic- I couldn’t walk back to the bedroom, so how was I to tell anyone what was happening?! I tried not to cry and hoped for a miracle.

Seconds later, that miracle came in the form of my sleepy father approaching the bathroom.

“What’s wrong love? You’re white as a sheet!” he exclaimed becoming fully awake.

“It’s the baby!” I exclaimed back. He started towards the inside of the bathroom, “Don’t step there, it’s a mess. I just… I don’t know what to do!”

“I’ll get your mother,” dad suggested shuffling back to his bedroom as I tried to ignore my discomfort.

I had never quite seen my mum move as quickly as she now did, grabbing up towels and shouting orders, “Have you got a bag packed Juliet? No? Alright, I’ll get a few things. John dear, go wake Robert please. Quickly now!” Mum and dad both raced into my room and Robert came out in a flash, pulling his jeans on with his shirt hanging from his mouth, almost knocking a lamp in the hallway over.

“Your mum said to meet her out in the car. Can you walk love?” he asked frantically coming to my side.

I nodded, “I think so, but not far. The contractions are coming on heavier.”

“Alright just hang onto me and breathe, just breathe,” he replied as we inhaled and exhaled in sync. Carefully, Robert helped me down the stairs and out to the car. When my parents came out, mum was still in her dressing gown, but dad had thrown on some day clothes and was carrying a bag for me. They got in the car and we were on our way as light rose on the horizon.
My father was always one for following the traffic laws normally, but normally his daughter was not in the backseat of his car moaning, about to pop out his grandchild. No, today he was speeding and praying to God the police didn’t notice it.

We made it to the local hospital in record time and Robert dashed into the building for a wheelchair and nurse, totally forgetting how recognizable he could be.

“I’ll get a doctor,” the nurse said frantically after directing us into the nearest open delivery room.

My father had somehow by then managed to eject himself from the situation and I’m sure went off to find himself a cup of morning coffee, while mother and Robert waited patiently with me on either side of the bed I now lay in holding my hands. Robert was actually grasping on tightly to me and I couldn’t help but smile at him.

The doctor came sprinting in then with the same nurse by his side. She shut us off to the rest of them to help me change into a hospital gown and hook me up to a few monitors. Then my mum and Robert were back by me as the doctor examined me.

The doctor tore off his latex glove and looked up at me, “Well the good news is you’re a few centimeters dilated already. The bad news is you’ll have to wait for the rest. But since your water broke on its own, it shouldn’t be too long.” The doctor flipped through some papers before talking again, “Your due date it seems is in about two weeks according to your charts.”

“Is that going to cause any complications?” Robert asked. I was praying it wouldn’t.

“It shouldn’t, your baby will just be a few pounds underweight, but there’s no reason to think it won’t be healthy.”

The doctor then gave the nurse a few instructions before leaving the room. The nurse came over to my side with a warm smile on her face, “Ok Mrs. Plant, now you just try to relax for the time being. We’ll try to make you as comfortable as possible, so if there’s anything you need just as for me. I’m Margaret.”

“Thanks,” I replied and she too left the room.

Despite the speed with which my water broke and the contractions came on, it was a few hours before I made the progression to labor. It was as if the babe inside of me wanted a few more moments in the womb so as to remember where it had come from. I spent the hours lay up in bed with Robert by my side in a chair, alternately holding my hand and alert, and slumped sleeping. I could have sworn he was more nervous than me! My parents left and were to be called the moment something happened. Even the band was made aware of it and we were told they were on their way home for the few days Robert was. Peter was just happy it seemed that the tour didn’t have to be canceled and Robert was willing to get back to it shortly. Part of me was jealous, but I had also dealt with Robert’s schedule for so man years already that it was to be expected. The show must go on.

It was nearly tea time when the contractions became stronger than ever and Robert raced out of the room to find the nurse and doctor. The doctor confirmed our hopes and informed us that I was now fully dilated; the baby was ready to come. The room became filled with more people; two more nurses came in to assist, while the doctor put on scrubs and told me to do one thing only, push HARD. With Robert on my left having his hand ripped off and the nurse who had been so loyal to us on my right, I let the sweat pour out of my body and concentrated harder than I ever had on getting that baby out of me.

The cycle of breathing and pushing went on till I thought I would burst open and I could no longer do anymore. “It’s crowning!” the doctor announced and looked up and met my eyes, “One more Juliet, just one more big push!” A last ounce of energy seemed to come from nowhere and take more over as I pushed as hard as I could, groaning in pain. My groans were overshadowed then by the unmistakable cries of a baby, loud and breaking through it all. I relaxed immediately and put my head on the pillow, trying to calm my breathing as a smile grew on my face and I watched the nurses take my baby to be wrapped in a blanket.

Robert kissed me on the head, “I’m so proud of you.”

As soon as it had been taken from me, the baby was placed in my arms, screaming and pink. My emotions overcame me and I began sobbing with happiness. ‘It’s a girl’ I heard the nurse say and I eyed Robert with a knowingly smile while he cooed over his child lovingly. She was beautiful; she had big brown eyes that wildly looked around her, and a tuft of dark blonde hair on her head. In the back of my brain, the very back, I felt relieved. This was really Robert’s child, our child, our daughter.

I caressed her little head as her color began to lighten and the nurse approached us, “What’s her name?”

Robert and I looked at each other; we had discussed it only one time but now we both seemed to know what we had picked stuck. She was truly our little flower, “Thalia Elizabeth.” He announced and than looked back at me with slight tears in his eyes, kissing me softly. The nurse smiled brightly and wrote it down. A few minutes later, she took Thalia from my arms to the nursery, and a few minutes after that I had fallen into a restful sleep.
I was awoken what seemed like minutes later voices surrounding me. It seemed my parents were back, already holding their granddaughter while Robert stood by, and Jimmy and the others had arrived as well. They all hugged Robert as brothers would and Jonesy and Bonzo said hello to me before leaving the room again. Jimmy approached the bed and I felt butterflies in my stomach. He only smiled sweetly and sat down.

“She’s beautiful Juliet,” he said. I grinned. Jimmy reached for my hand and I let it brush over my knuckles. He furrowed his brow, as if he’d expected more, and then stood up uncomfortable. He leaned down and kissed my cheek, “I’ll see you soon.” And as soon as he had come, Jimmy was gone. And I knew what he’d really meant; we certainly were not over yet.

Expect loads of upcoming drama. You know, whenever I write it, LOL! Hopefully it'll be sooner than later.
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